Des Moines, Iowa - A space shuttle returning from a recent visit to russian space station "Smirnoff", unexpectedly landed in a Wal-Mart parking lot in Iowa.
The space shuttle "Penetration" landed safely in front of the chain supermarket yesterday afternoon. The cause for the premature landing has been contributed to alcohol.
Captain Robert Jensen, the man in charge of the shuttle landing, was soon arrested and immediately released when local authorities were unable to figure out how to charge the drunk pilot.
"I mean how the hell are we supposed to get this guy with a DUI?" said local Sheriff Roger Popkis. "He came in doing like 25,000 mph and landed it neatly between the Wal-Mart tire center and McDonalds. Fucking incredible!"
Authorities also say the Captian claimed he thought he could take the shuttle down to grab some more beer and cheetos for the hold em game that was in progress on the space station.
"He really thought it would work and no would notice a huge ass fireball coming out of the sky and landing at Wal-Mart." Added sheriff Popkis.
NASA has yet to comment on the incident.