Washington AC/DC - (Lee Harvey Oswald Mess): Presidential wannabe Barrack Obama lining up iconic JFK daughter Caroline Kennedy Schlossberg to be his Veep? Say it ain't so!
"He's salivating profusely at the dream ticket prospect," the political editor of LA FagHagSlagMag celeb newspaper commented today, "blind to the vipers' pit that is the tenunous gagging order about her former sister-in-law Carolyn Bessette Kennedy RIP."
The lissom peroxide blonde died in a mysterious light aircraft disappearance along with husband JFK Jr and her sister in July 1999.
The bodies were eventually recovered from the sea bed some seven miles off Martha's Vineyard where thirty years earlier JFK Jr's uncle Ted Kennedy killed Mary Jo Kopechne in a drunken DUI incident which he officially survived.
The July 1999 fatality was followed by an immediate cremation, ordered by both grieving, panic-stricken families, skipping legal formalities such as an autopsy and inquest.
The victims' ashes were hurriedly scattered at sea the following day.
The Kennedy family then fought tooth and nail to excise from public records Bessette's five hear heroin addiction, shredding any evidence of pending divorce papers and police arrest logs.
"Top theory about that plane crash involves JFK Jr's predilection for snorting cocaine," the celebrity paper source added.
"There's plenty of evidence Bessette got the weekend's two wraps mixed up and gave her husband, who was piloting the Cessna, her 85% pure smack to snort.
"The plane went down very quickly and all three perished as a result."
The entire tacky saga has had millions of dollars poured over it to santise the whole hideous mess.
"Somebody however - maybe an old GOP fox like John McCain, knows the sordid truth and could be willing to blow the thing sky high in the November run-up," the magazine editorial concluded today.