Washington AC/DC - (Ass Mess): Presumptive Democratic presidential nominee Barack Obama owes his entire White House campaign victory to brilliant restorative dentistry according to the US Dentists Association which has voted his smile as his most convincing personal feature.
Almost $50,000-worth of orthodontics magic went into creating the iconic feature that has successfully wooed US voters into trusting him with their agendas.
"Let's face it, he's a rather weedy-looking lightweight and without that megabux smile would be just another GOP-lampoonery statistic," consultant dental surgeon Dr Ephron Schwartzkopf said today.
Obama of course is having none of it and credits his staggering landslide victory over Hillary Clinton to the laws of natural attraction between candidate and an increasingly sophisticated, intelligent and prescient electorate.
"They love me for my natural boyish looks and awesome political nous (sic)," Obama confided to pals this weekend.
GOP stringpullers meanwhile are convinced that the Senator for Illinois may have meant 'noose'.
Nanci Pelosi is cracking up.