Washington, D.C. - George W. Bush disclosed yesterday that his entire presidency was part of an elaborate "gag" concocted by himself and Vice President Al Gore that "just got out of control".
The two men, having met briefly during the 2000 campaign, agreed at that time that whoever actually won would pretend that the other was the winner. "Florida was really a landslide for Al. He was the clear winner. We just got Jeb and the Election Commission to make things look like a complete mess for the sake of our prank. We even talked some of the boys on the Supreme Court into going along with the joke."
What seemed funny for a few months lost some of its humor when 9/11 occurred. "I called Al and said, 'Man, I'm in too deep!'", said Bush. By that time however, Gore could see the writing on the wall and decided he didn't want any part of it. "He goes off and starts saving polar bears, while I'm left with Al Qaeda", the 'President' said.
As the gag seemed to be getting more and more out of hand, Bush found himself facing another term. "I did beat Kerry", says Bush, "but, since I ran as an encumbent - which I never was - you could argue that that whole thing was bogus too."
Still, Bush says he has no regrets. "I've had a hell of a run", he concluded. "Screw 'em if they can't take a joke."