Written by Mr. Eades
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Topics: Dogs, Cats, Catnip

Friday, 6 June 2008

The first cat-dog hybrid was born this week in the U.S, inciting anger from anti-interspecialists. Oscar, a four year old Persian-Siamese crossbreed successfully impregnated Marlee, a four year old Saint Bernard.

Marlee gave birth to a litter of seven; two still-born and five healthy cat-dog hybrids.

Charles Freedman, the owner of both pets, has faced ridicule from his neighbors ever since Oscar and Marlee's relationship was made public.

"It's aint right, animals aint not sposed to mix on each other," commented Sarah Hartless, Freedman's neighbor for 15 years.

A successful biochemist, Freedman attributes his success to long hours and experimentation. "They've been playmates since they were 6 weeks old, but getting them to copulate took a little extra effort."

Freedman used his knowledge of biochemicals to concoct a pheromone that would be conducive to interspecial sexual attraction.

"Oscar is crazy for catnip, so the process of getting him to 'unite' with Marlee involved a little ingenuity."

Freedman's catnip paste acted like the catalyst for the sexsplosion that would occur between the two animals. It accounted for Oscar's increase in libido and an unusual approach to foreplay.

"The strategic placement of the paste will create a powerful attraction between cat and dog, and if administered correctly, will result in a successful fertilization."

Many of Freedman's neighbors have unleashed verbal and physical threats because of his new paste, but he is confident that it will lead to more healthy relationships between cats and dogs.

"Seeing the way it has affected my pets has inspired me to come up with a paste for humans. It could be a real boost to any relationship that has lost passion, no matter how unattractive one's partner has become."

If interested in trying the Catnip Paste on your cats and dogs, feel free to visit Mr. Freedman's Catnip Shop in Gretna, Virginia, USA.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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