Written by Chuck Barber
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Topics: Death, Nazi

Thursday, 13 May 2004

image for Rumsfeld: Never Owned Nazi Book
Heil Bush

(Washington, D.C.) Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld said he was shocked and embarrassed when a former house keeper related to a reporter that she saw Running A Nazi Death Camp For Dummies on the book shelf in his home study.

"I have never owned that book . . . I've seen it . . . I have had it, yes, . . . not owned . . . a gift . . . well . . . a loan, really . . . not mine . . . not at all."

Running A Nazi Death Camp For Dummies was published "for educational purposes only" by the American Nazi Party in 2001. It is based on, but not associated with, the popular "For Dummies" series which cover everything from dog grooming to car repair to working on advanced electronics.

Purportedly written from notes compiled by famed American Nazi party leader the late George Lincoln Rockwell, Running A Nazi Death Camp For Dummies features chapters such as:

Solutions - An overview by Reinhard Heydrich; Stocking Your Death Camp by Arthur Seyss-Inquart; Managing A Withering Population by Rudolf Hoess (commandant of Auschwitz); Throwing Mama From The Train - High Impact Collisions on Human Body Integrity by Josef Mengele

A red faced Rumsfeld admitted that the book had been in his house at one time but no longer and that he'd never found the time to read it. "I thought, just glancing at it, mind you, that it was a terrible and obscene work."

When asked if the book had impacted his thinking on treatment of Iraqi prisoners Rumsfeld frowned and asked, "Next question."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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