(Athens, GA) -- Despite hundreds of pages declaring opponent John McCain healthy and "cancer-free", Barack Obama's campaign would not deny rumors yesterday that its candidate has prostate cancer.
The democratic candidate still refuses to release his medical evaluation.
Proctologist Frank Bachtdur, the member of the McCain medical staff who pronounced McCain's prostrate "cancer free" understood Obama's reluctance to have an exam.
"I've examined many guys and, neary to a man, it's wrecked 'em."
Clinton Campaign strategist Mo Elleithe raised further suspicions.
"Perhaps there was something to what Hillary said about waiting to see what happens by mid-June. Maybe she really had her finger on something...that pot of gold at the end of the campaign rainbow" added Elleithe.
David Axelrod, the voice of the Obama campaign, refused to respond, further fueling prostate rumors.
McCain himself, however, was quick to comment that "like all things in the 2008 Democratic campaign, this too will be determined in the end."