Written by David Hawkins
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Wednesday, 7 May 2008

image for Lethal Injection Declared A Party Drug In Florida
Watch them in hospitals. They are always stealing things.

Snug Harbor, FL - Thousands of senior citizens, elderly folks, old farts, and just plain "Age-Challenged" are coming back to their nursing homes, assisted living facilities, and their houses wasted off their asses and then dying - according to a small Indian man in my garage eating a cheese sandwich and stealing my tools.

Old people aren't getting any attention any more talking about World War II and things like Hitler and the atom bombs, things that seem tame now that we have Dictator Bush and his Serial Wars For Israel. So in order to get attention and some drugs for fun, they were saying they were depressed. That didn't work so well after a while because depression and stupid pharmaceuticals only go so far.

Now old farts are on to the harder stuff, notably, lethal injection, electrocution, hanging, firing squad, gas chamber, and decapitation. The average senior in the US is on 11 drugs from the crazed doctors that are now mainly from third world countries and the nether parts of NYC.

With all the mental debilitation caused by the "Medical" establishment and watching the corporate-controlled-opinion-forming Tee Vee box these people's little brains are spun and wrung out. They have little clubs now where they get together and figure out how to party with lethal injections, guillotines, nooses, etc.

"Some are more fun than others, and sure there's a risk, but my adrenalin gland is non-existent so it's harder to find a thrill. And it's worth the risk." said Karen Kasplinkatazoink of Snug Harbor Florida.

Then Ms. Kasplinkatazoink started talking about when she was a little girl in New York and about her son Herschel who is a doctor or a lawyer or something so we ignored her and left.

Judge Ridnick "Bubba" Dogsniffinganotherdogsasshole, of Brevard County District Court decided that all these cases of old fogies with stolen letal drugs were just too much of a hassle because old people don't stay in jail as long as a 20 years old with a 'stick of grass' and since they need more people in jail it just makes sense to call it a "Party Drug" and let them go. As far as building a guillotine in your garage goes, the grizzled, old, hillbilly, Florida judge (now that was redundant) who studied the same correspondence law course Abraham Lincoln said, "Let them do what they want. We can't ban woodworking."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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