Washington D.C., capitol city of The United States of America, has filed paperwork to receive a restraining order against George W. Bush. The order seeks to keep the President from leaving the city in January of 2009, after the inauguration of his replacement.
Edgar Adams of the City Attorney's office issued the following statement in regards to the order: "We've had the President in Washington for almost eight years. Do you know how hard and expensive it is to find a good, capable village idiot?"
"Even though he will be out of office due to term limitations, we still want Dubya to know that he has a position and is wanted and needed here."
"The good ones stay where they are. Britney Spears will never leave Hollywood. That inbred Kennedy family is locked into their Cape Cod compound (except when they come out to die in flying or skiing accidents, drown their girlfriends, or get drunk in Washington). Rush Limbaugh stays put in his little corner of the world."
When asked about the Bush family, Adams was firm in that position also. "Every President has some skanky members of his family and some embarrasing relatives. The twins don't need to stay as they can fade into obscurity, where the Billy Carters and Maureen Reagans and Trish Nixons belong."
He concluded by saying that "George Bush belongs to Washington now. We will allow him to stay as long as he continues to miss all of the questions on Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader."