Florida - (Fishy Mess): In an old piscine trick learned from Dickless Cheney former US President George Herbert Bush caught what anglers have described as 'a massive tampon' this weekend while fishing off the Florida Keys near Islamophobia, Fla.
"It was a whopper," an eyewitness said, "weighing in at around 100 pounds.
"We guess it must have been custom-made for a very special client. Maybe Rosie O'Donnell or Ann Coulter?"
The former President looked stunned and delighted as pals photographed him with his trophy.
"Of course, he had to throw it straight back in the water," a fishy friend confided.
"You can imagine the reception he'd have got from Mrs Bush if he turned up at home with his spoils of whore."
Some GOP admirers however are so impressed they are forking out thousands of dollars to have a fibreglass reproduction built to hang eventually next to a life size replica of Playboy centerfold Anna Nicole Smith's breasts at the President George H Bush Memorial Presidential Library in Texas A&M University.
Another replica will have pride of place at the CIA HQ named after him, the President Bush Center For Intelligence (sic), in Langley, Virginia.
George Tenet is raving bonkers.