Stunning the electorate and sending a defiant message, Senator John McCain announced today that he has selected current Vice President Dick Cheney to be his running mate. The move sets Cheney up to be the only Vice President to serve under consecutive presidents.
"He is comfortable in all of the secret undisclosed places and has the most experience at being despised. He loves it, and I love Dick," McCain said.
Despite obviously reducing the odds of an assassination attempt on himself, the unpopular Cheney is widely viewed as a liability to McCain's chances of winning the general election.
However, a longtime Republican insider close to both men dismissed this saying, "They are running against either a woman or a black man. Keeping Cheney on the world stage lets us settle scores. Serious people know that we'll never see a woman or a colored elected in this lifetime."