Written by AAJetMan

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Sunday, 23 March 2008

image for POLL: 78% of Florida Dems Planning Move to North Carolina
Floridians Stampede for Exodus from Land of Disenfranchisement

AP, SARASOTA -- Citing feelings of being disenfranchised, 78% of Floridian democrats are planning to move to North Carolina before the primary of the 'First in Flight' State, according to a recent AP poll.

"We took off work to vote in our own (Democratic) primary, and now the whacko DNC says our votes don't count" lamented Gracie Jones of Sarasota.

"I don't get it. All of a sudden this Party is worrying about rules. I mean, (former President) Billy refused to resign when he was impeached, we made illegal recounts in the 2000 election, Senator (Hillary) Clinton had her illegal book deal. None of that stopped us. Why should stupid DNC rules?! I'm outta here", exclaimed a disgusted Jones.

Jones is far from alone. The AP poll indicated that millions of Floridians will migrate to North Carolina to have a meaningful vote in the Democratic primaries.

The DNC rendered invalid all votes from Michigan and Florida in accordance to restrictions prohibiting premature primaries.

A similar AP poll in the Detroit metropolitan area indicated that only 4% of its democratic voters planned moving to North Carolina.

However, when the Michigan poll question included the clause "if you were guaranteed to sell your house at no more than a 20% loss", those planning to move rocketed to 92%.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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