Despite his confession, stingray Samuel "The Hit Manna" Volare won't be serving serious time for his murder of a Michigan boater in Florida.
The Monroe County DA lessened charges against Volare - who admitted to leaping from the water into a deadly collision with the hapless boater - to "one year involuntary manslaughter" in exchange for Volare's information leading to the location of the stingray that murdered Steve Irwin.
Volare succumbed to the deal after several hours of intense interrogation without and food and water.
"I can go hours without food, but I needs me agua" Volare later confided.
Assisting due to the crime's international scope, the FBI confirmed Volare's story that "El Matador" -- the only known name of the stingray that killed popular tv show host and conservationist Steve Irwin in 2006 -- has found refuge in the Venezuelan coastal town of Coro.
Further FBI investigation also collaborated Volare's statement that "El Matador" performs twice daily at Coro's Mundo del Mar, an aquatic amusement park doubling as Venezuela's lone advanced Naval training facility.
Despite knowledge of his whereabouts, "El Matador's" extradition seems unlikely given the tense relationship between the United States and Venezuela, and mounting evidence of President Chavez's affectionate bi-weekly visits to the stingray.