Written by Panndyra
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Topics: Washington, boring

Friday, 30 April 2004

image for Nightline Controversy: Koppel's Krazy
You can't stopp-el Ted Koppel

Washington, DC

Ted Koppel has decided, because Nightline isn't boring enough, that he would read Ernest Hemingway's For Whom the Bell Tolls on air tonight.

There is a major outcry from the American public. Some complaints include:

  • "I don't wanna hear nothin' 'bout no book learnin'. It's dangerous." -- President George "Dubya" Bush
  • "Who cares the novel was about the Spanish Civil War. Who gives a rats' patootie about Spain? They pulled out for crissakes." ---Franco American
  • "Finally, Ted Koppel has found the cure for insomnia. ---Dr. Spock, not the baby expert"
  • " I thought he was reading the names of the dead of the Iraqi war, idiot?"-- My mother


I guess it all depends on your interpretation. Regardless both Jay Leno and Dave Letterman have banded together to send Koppel a thank you card for improving their ratings. Jay Leno supposedly said, "He can't compete with my line-up on a good day. Now, he pulls this. Koppel's Krazy."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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