Texarse - (Reuterus & Ass Mess): A Harris County woman is suing American Mile High Airlines after a male passenger's penile emissions overshot the Boeing 747's bathroom, ripped a hole in the business class furniture and belly flopped straight onto her expensive new hairdo.
Twenty one year- old Ms Centava Dozier, 21, has filed for $1 million damages alleging the plane's recent internal refurbishment program was inadequate.
Her deposition says the airline failed to prevent a recurrence of their mile high club's most common hazard, the premature ejaculation equivalent of spontaneous projectile vomiting syndrome.
Ms Dozier says she was sitting in an empty row at the start of the flight "and then dozing off just like normal."
However she was "soon woken up horribly" as the internal partition separating the business class seating area was suddenly and inexplicably torn away, followed by the smashing apart of a number of aisle seats.
"The next thing I knew this five litre gob of ejaculate landed straight on my brand new hairdo! Like I should need some kinky hair-conditioner. I ask you."
American Mile High Airlines officials have been instructed to say nothing pending legal proceedings later this month.