Written by queen mudder
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Topics: eliot spitzer

Saturday, 15 March 2008

image for FBI: Holy Roman Emperor Club VIP hooker is shielding Spitzer
the 21st century's Holy Roman Emperor himself

New York - (Fetid Ass Mess): This weekend's LA FagHagSlagMag editorial says the FBI believes NY call girl Ashley Dupre is shielding Eliot Spitzer's ass after he was penetrated by Al Qaeda in a fetishistic gay sex blackmail scam.

"No doubt about it: Spitzer's pure genius at promoting a hetero front," the column adds, "and Dupre is the pubic face of a colossal cock-up.

The magazine says Federal sources have known for the last 17 years that Gov Spitzer was stung in an elaborate gay bribe scam targeting the KGB while working as a NYC public prosecutor.

A deposition filed today states Spitzer has gone to extreme lengths to take the minor hetero call-girl rap in desperate plea-bargain attempts covering up for a 9/11 cabal implicating him as an ExxonMobil stooge.

The magazine adds that Spitzer was recruited by mobster associates of the bankrupt Middle East bank BCCI which his Manhattan District Attorney boss Bob Morgenthau closed down in 1991.

"Cayman Islands Vatican-controlled offshore accounts had a gaping $13 billion hole after the 1991 fiasco," the editorial states.

"Spitzer was hired to track down these mobster funds which are integral to pre-9/11 financing of the Bush flagship of convenience known as Al Qaeda."

An update is expected later this week.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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