Written by Perry Winnwet
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Topics: water boarding

Sunday, 9 March 2008

image for Water Boarding Proven Ineffective-Scientist Says "Duh!"
Dude, let's go boarding

Scientists have just finished experiments that tested the effectiveness of water-boarding. The results, horrible, without any trace of evidence that it even worked prior to terrorist testing as a form of interrogation.

One leading scientist knew all along that the whole thing was just some outrageous way to spend money. "I mean, think of it this way, you're trying to torture people legally, or if you're the CIA, illegally, by putting them on surf boards and not letting them stop for five hours. Duh, there's no way this could ever work! The terrorists begged for anything but this 'torture', when in fact this was a vacation to them. Who seriously thought that making them surf would be an ideal way to obtain information? It's preposterous, just plain stupid."

The United States is currently looking for whomever came up with the idea. Anybody with information should call 1-800-CIA, then not give the information.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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