Santa BarbaraWalters, Ca - (Thriller Ass Mess): Sordid Arabia's Prince Bandar has offered to pay tribute artiste Michael Jackson's debts after bailiffs threatened to auction his Neverland site and donate the proceeds to Unisyph.
Bandar was recently outed as being the Jackson clone's father following a sleazy fling with Yoko Ono in a Little Rock trailer park one freebase-fueled night of insanity many moons ago.
Jackson owes $25 million on a JP Morgan mortgage originally brokered by ex-UK Prime Monster Tony Blair.
Blair, now a Global Piss Process luminary, recently took up a JP Morgan consultancy to smooth the litigation process facing Jackson.
According to former CIA sources the real Jackson was topped by Hugh Rodham in a crack dealership dispute back in 1991.
His body is said to be buried under the Peter Pan clock face at Neverland along with over 50 landmines donated by Princess Diana from her humanitarian relief effort days.
Tony Snow is ashen white with angst.