Written by Jesus Budda
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Friday, 14 March 2008

image for Elephant Forgets To Lock Back Door
Doh, did I do bad?

A zookeeper at San Francisco zoo has been relating how all the animals have managed to secretly sneak and go on wild trips to Vegas each nite this month.

Security cameras at Cesar's Palace casino detected a lot of animals hanging around gambling tables and slot machines.

"These animals were clearly not part of a magic show", said head of casino security, Frank Fugedaboudit, "they were out-of-towners and slightly gay in their mannerisms".

Suspicion was naturally directed at San Francisco zoo. Chief zookeeper, Tony Morony, kept his animals under surveillance that evening.

"I did what I usually do", said Morony, "once the zoo shut for the day, I put the animals in their cages and gave the keys to Nelly the Elephant so that she can lock up so I could head home".

"I thought Nelly was the reliable one. But I was wrong. She never locked up. The animals got out and took the bus to Vegas".

The next morning at 4am, all the animals returned by bus and re-entered their cages.

"I always wondered why the animals were so lethargic and laid about in their cages", pondered Morony, "I should have figured it out much sooner".

"Nelly's the real disappointment. I was so sure she'd never forget to lock up. In future I'll go with the baboons".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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