Written by shea lo
Print this
Topics: Barack Obama

Wednesday, 6 February 2008

image for Barack Obama's "Audacity of HYPE" fails to win Super-Duper Tuesday

On a night when there wasn't even a decent movie worth watching on TV - Super-Tuesday emerged a big winner in the "circus entertainment" genre.

Despite the speculation by pollsters, hacks and cable-tv 'talking gasbags", (pundits, as they have the affront to call themselves) - everyone was proven wrong!

Barack Obama's "Audacity of HYPE" failed to deliver him Massachusetts - the backyard of his great endorsers the Boston Brahmin Kennedy-Kerry duo. Nor did "First Lady Maria Shriver" do much to convince California to throw itself behind the "Great Black-White Hope" as Obama is being sold to all. Could it be that the "Kennedy Curse" lives on? After all, both Teddy-K and John-K failed in their Dem-Prez quests.

Despite voting for Obama, Nona Smiley said, "Mr. Obama's speech last night was merely 'lofty rhetoric' at its best.

I'd heard it all before, how he is the best Change-meister of all time, and the time is now. Heck, it was a sermon to the converted loaded with inclusive terms like: WE will change America. WE will get politicians out of Washington. Excuse me, is the President not a politician backed by a party? I was disappointed".

Joe Sharp, a self-described curmudgeon who has no medical insurance said, "Many voters whose voices have not been heard feel that Mr. Obama has been coddled by a media afraid to 'do its job' in hard-questioning his true credentials; cossetted by his surrogate mothers (Oprah-Caroline Kennedy-Maria Shriver)who want voters to love their guy just because and capitalized upon by the Kennedy-Kerry faction of the Dem Party in the hopes that by riding on Obama's coat-tails, these yesterday's men can resurrect their flagging political careers".

Many 50-something Hillary female supporters questioned: "Does anyone realllllly believe Maria Shriver when she says she 'made up her mind' at the last minute to endorse Obama? Or that Caroline Kennedy-Schlossberg's teenagers helped her make up her mind? Do these women have no minds of their own, no ability to make decisions on their own or is this an example of uber-rich kids being indulged by parents? Do they think the rest of us women live in a bubble?"

Ann and Alan Malaney (Undecided) said, "Obama's supporters seriously need to question what sort of "Change' they want the next time they parrot "Yes we can" or the patronising Si se puede. What exactly does Change mean? Does change for the latte-sipping, designer-label wearing, Kennedy-clan and their ultra-liberal Gen Y pack mean the same thing as it does for the average working American?"

All agreed that Mr. Obama is a wonderful orator, as evidenced by his long-winded sermon last night. "But voters have a right to know what he really stands for, what he means by "change" and how he will effect change."

For these Undecideds, the only way is for Obama to debate Hillary Clinton on: policy, the economy, a looming recession, a failed foreign policy, a potential future terror attack, etc.

Added Joe Sharp, "Saying I'll talk to foreign leaders is not enough. That pre-supposes that they want to talk to you. What if they refuse? Will Mama Oprah serve them cookies baked by her flavor-of-the month chef-cum-personal trainer, or shower gift packages on leaders of the Axis of Evil?"

There's a nagging feeling out there among the Undecideds: It's a question of Charisma over Substance. According to radio shock-jock Mixt Metafor, "Mr. Obama must now put his money where his mouth is; walk the talk; stop the sermons and get down to cold hard facts. We need to see how he performs in a REAL debate - those flashes of arrogance; the testy moments, the condescending looks and put-down remarks towards Hillary. My vote hinges on all this."

As a true-undecided voter, A. J. Barndollar said " I need to see the real guy under all that hype, cos I really don't know what he's all about. Heck I change my socks every day and sometimes even that ain't enough!"

Make shea lo's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 4 multiplied by 2?

1 8 14 2
66 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more