Des Moine, IA - In a shocking move today the Hillary Clinton campaign, in an attempt to break away from Barrack Obama, has sent Bill Clinton on the road with this message, "Hillary Clinton is half African American."
"Not only that," said Bill in a telephone interview with this Spoof reporter, "She's had sexual relations with Nelson Mandela and Magic Johnson. I have evidence just in case there's ever any legal trouble."
The Clinton campaign has unleashed these shocking revelations in an attempt to "humanize" Hillary, but it may be too late to convince many Iowans.
"I don't buy it," said one Iowa farmer, "I shook her hand and at the same time put my other hand to her wrist to check for a pulse, NOTHING!"
"If she were human, then why the heck is she still married to Bill?" asked Henrietta Stover in Mason City, "I say she could have relations with the L.A. Lakers, and it wouldn't make her any more human!"
Magic Johnson and Nelson Mandela are now on the campaign trail in Iowa, much the way Oprah Winfrey has gone to bat for O'Bama. "Hillary Clinton is a friend of mine," said Magic Johnson, "I'm proud to say that she's more than a first lady with me."
"I know many wonder what someone from South Africa can say to the American people about a Presidential Candidate," said Mandela to a crowd of people in Des Moine, "Hillary made my jewels sing one night, I don't know how else to put it."
The Iowa Caucus is now just two weeks away.