Written by Bob Muppet
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Friday, 2 April 2004

image for Queen to Ride 'Camillas Folly' in Kentucky Derby
The Royal Kentucky Mount

The parlous state of the Royal Household's finances was exposed, yesterday when it was announced that The Queen would be riding a Royal Mount in The Kentucky Derby.

Her Majesty confessed that she could not afford the services of a professional jockey as she had just paid the gas and electricity bills for her swanky Buckingham Palace residence, and was now ‘well skint'.

Despite being very old, the silver-haired monarch is still an accomplished horse-woman and her horse, ‘Camilla's Folly' is tipped as odds on favourite by the bookmakers.

Prince Phillip, her Greek-born husband also expressed great confidence that his wife would perform well in this year's event and hoped that there would be no repetition of last years fiasco, when she was brought down by a stray horse.

Tony Blair, who is a strong advocate of making older British people work until they dropped dead, applauded the Royal gesture.

‘The Queen Is just following in the footsteps of her Scottish mum,' the war-loving Prime Minister stated.

'I remember the Queen Mother romping home to win the Derby on her 98th birthday',

'Tough as old boots she was! '

'And she downed 15 pints of 'Bud' in the dressing room after the race,' Tony recalled.

'God bless the Queen !'

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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