Written by Andrew Lawrence
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Sunday, 16 December 2007

image for 2nd Amendment Comes Under Fire By U.S. Supreme Court
the right to bare arms

(Washington) - The U.S. Supreme Court today announced it would rule on a landmark case involving the second amendment to the U.S. Constitution; the right of private citizens to bare arms ...

Many Americans are outraged that the U.S. federal government, i.e. the U.S. Supreme Court, is going to rule on whether or not a citizen has the right to bare arms; i.e., the right to own a short sleeve or sleeveless garment, the right to wear a garment which exposes their arms. Presidential candidate Ron Paul exclaimed, "Since the founding of America, men and women have always had the right to bare arms. Especially during the summer months when it's hot outside. Even the original Americans, native American Indians, in the hot summer months either wore no top at all or wore buckskin tops with short sleeves or no sleeves. Every American has the right to bare arms. And the government should stay out of people's closets!"

If the U.S. Supreme Court rules against an individual's right to bare arms it would be catastrophic for the T-shirt industry and could also lead to an immediate ban on wearing hawaiian shirts in Florida and California. A spokesperson for The American Wife-Beater's T-shirt Assn, Vinnie Barbarino, formerly of the TV show Welcome Back Kotter, stated, "Whut? I got 2 good arms and I'm gonna show 'em off. I don't care what the Supremes do, I'm gonna wear my wife-beater T-shirt."

In America, the Second Amendment is under fire. In America, the right to bare arms may be in jeopardy. In America, people are asking, "what rights will the government try to take away next, the right to bare legs?"


copyright 2007 Andrew Lawrence

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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