Written by Jesus Budda
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Topics: Barack Obama, Poo

Wednesday, 14 November 2007

image for Hilary Clinton "Stink Palms" Obama
Hilary has perfected the "double stink palm" routine

World-class bitch, Hilary Clinton has got one over on her Democratic rival Barrack Obama by performing the old "stink palm" routine so beloved of college troublemakers.

The news comes just as an Iowa poll shows Clinton with 29 percent on the Democratic side, but Obama running a close second with 27 percent. Edwards was trailing with 20 percent in that same poll.Clinton, too, held a stronger lead in the New Hampshire poll, with 37 percent. Obama earned 22 percent in the survey, while Edwards, with 9 percent, trailed far behind the 18 percent of undecided voters.

Much of the credit for the growing gap in favor of Clinton centers on a sweet move she learned from her husband which he utilised during his successful election campaigns.

"There's nothing more important than pressing the flesh", said Hilary Clinton earlier today, "And Bill knows more than anyone about that".

"Meeting ordinary people and shaking hteir hands is an integral part of getting your message across. So I make sure I get into town early, meet as many little old ladies, Milfs, hillbillys and so on. I give 'em a good ol' grip and a brush of the Clinton 'charm'".

"Then I hop in my limo, stick my hand up my asss - naturally giving it a good scratch and wriggle - cause I have just one more person to greet".

And the person in question was Barrack Obama, her nearest rival for the Democratic vote.

"I smile like a Cheshire cat, reach for his outstretched hand and stink palm the sh*t out of him, then wham, I'm gone outta there".

"By the time he realises what's happened, it's too late. He'll only get the smell after shaking hands with a couple of hundred locals. Anybody unlucky enough to come across Obama is in for a 'treat'. And ever single one of them will remember Barrack come voting day as the guy that covered their hands in stinky pooh", laughs Clinton, "it's an old trick. Abe Lincoln used it all the time. If it aint broke, don't fix it".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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