Written by Robert W. Armijo
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Topics: Global Warming

Tuesday, 13 November 2007

image for Care Bears may lose one of their own to global warming; Sun Bear on red list of endangered species; rumors of reactionary militancy abound
Care Bears may take action to revenge their own. So don't turn your back on this lot, okay

Kingdom of Caring, Care-a-lot - Sad news has finally dawned on the Kingdom of Caring of the Care Bears today as news from the World Conservation Union (IUCN) came that one of their own, Sun Bear, is on the institutions red list of endangered species of bears. In response, the Care Bears called for a gathering of all Care Bears under the Wishing Tree to wish away the bad news using their Care Bear Stare 'weapon', but alas, it was to no avail.

Reports came in form all over Care-a-lot of the news of the unprecedented gathering of all Care Bears for a Super Duper Care Bear Stare under the Wishing Tree to wish Sun Bear off the red list.

As they gathered there in the early predawn morning hours under the Wishing Tree, they formed a circle around it. At sunrise, they reached out, hands, and began to make the biggest Care Bear Stare ever witnessed before in the history of Kingdom of Caring, all focusing on the Wishing Tree.

There they stood all day and all into the night Staring at the Wishing Tree wishing Sun Bear off the red list as brightly rainbow colored streams of light emanating from their Belly Badges, until one by one each collapsed onto the ground from exhaustion.

As each fell back, the light from their little Belly Badges was extinguished and quickly encompassed by the dark fold of the night. There was a thick marine overcast, so not even light from the moon or dot of light from a single star shined or penetrated the absolute darkness above their little unconscious fuzzy bodies.

Although it was no surprise Bedtime Bear was the first to go, soon after others began to fall in the gloomy night. Others you would never expect to fall, ones like Birthday Bear, Friend Bear, and Love-A-Lot Bear.

"Tender Heart Bear had to be rushed to the hospital because of the strain on his heart," said Talk-A-Lot Bear. "He always had a weak heart."

Reportedly Funshine Bear was the last to fall, as he was the fondest of Sun Bear.

Later the following day, one by one as each of the Care Bears awoken to the harsh reality that their Super Duper Care Bear Stare did not work and one of them was even in hospital due to the attempt.

Without saying a word to each other, except for Grumpy Bear, each crawled back to their caves in an attempt to off-season hibernate in hopes of recovering their strength.

"I knew it wouldn't work!" yelled Grumpy Bear. He then took an axe to the Wishing Tree and proceeded to chop it down.

"There! You see! Now there's no going back!" screamed Grumpy Bear.

No word as to the future plans of the Care Bears as Secret Bear declared a state of emergency in Kingdom of Caring, citing that security is more important than democracy and then ordered a media blackout.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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