(Atlanta) - The State of Georgia is undergoing the worst drought in its history. The long hard drought threatens to dry up crops, dry up money and dry up people. Things are so bad that Governor Sonny Perdue last week, in desperation, called for the people of Georgia to pray for rain ... and was promptly sued by anti-religious fanatics.
Liberal activist groups opposed to religion are suing Perdue, claiming he is calling for a religious activity (prayer) while holding a government office (governor). This violates the American legal doctrine of Separation Of Church And State and, even though this may be true, though the residents of Georgia may die of thirst from lack of rain, liberals will force them to keep God and religion out of it.
The State of Georgia and its major city, Atlanta, are desperate for water and have also pleaded with environmentalists to forgo the usual allotment of water for ecological, wilderness and animal habitats so that the water may be used instead for the survival of human beings. The plea fell on deaf ears as millions of people, and pets, in Atlanta are running out of water and are in danger of dying of thirst. This, in the city home to the world headquarters of Coca Cola.
Even Nobel Peace Prize winner, Al Gore, chimed in, saying that, "The Georgia drought is caused by localized global warming which, scientifically, is caused by the ownership of SUV's in the South. I know this because I'm from Tennessee."
In total desperation, the Governor of Georgia today turned to local Indian tribes, pleading with them to perform the ancient ritual of the rain dance. Governor Perdue stated, "Let the liberal bastards sue me for that one!"
No politically correct liberal would dare to offend Native Americans. Christians, yes. Everybody else, no.
copyright 2007 Andrew Lawrence