Johannesburg, South Africa - Now officially apart of their academic curriculum, the girls at Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy south of Johannesburg will have Oprah's personal phone number preprogrammed into their new cell phones, pepper spray and attend mandatory self-defense courses. In addition, each of the girls will be assigned their own personal Blackwater security detail assigned to them 24 hours, seven days a week.
"We are satisfied that these additional security measures will ensure the safety of all the girls at Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy," said a spokesperson for Oprah Winfrey.
Currently Oprah is considering architectural changes to the campus as well that will enhance the safety of the young girls.
"Oprah has contacted us to redesign the academy campus with security in mind," confirmed KBR, a Haliburton spin-off. "We will be turning to the Twelfth Century for our inspiration on this project seeing that's where the world is headed now days."
Although Oprah refused to discuss the design changes in any detail, permits pulled at the local city hall show plans for the installation of a draw bridge at the main and service entrances, archers towers all along the 40 foot high stone walls and a moat encircling the entire perimeter of the compound.
The academy will be renamed to accurately reflect the changes and new emphasis on security: "Oprah Winfrey's Martial Arts Compound and Leadership Academy for Girls Prepared for Any Situation."