Asheville, North Carolina (IP) - Governor Demsey Dumpster of North Carolina has ordered North Carolina residents not to use the bathroom.
The order was issued so as to save water which is in short supply in the state.
The state is issuing butt plugs and adult diapers to its residents and inspectors will make surprise visits at all hours of the day and night in order to insure compliance.
The governor says its OK to go outside to use the bathroom and also is encouraging the use of port-o-lets and porta potties.
The governor has ordered state workers to build desalinization plants along the coast and will lay pipelines that will reach 600 miles to the west so the state's golf courses can be watered on a daily basis.