WILLIAMSBURG, KY- A recent survey conducted in the social epicenter of America, Williamsburg, Ky, reveals that most believe that Ron Paul is not a threat to any of the republican candidates.
Chuck Schumacher, a 55 year old retired taxidermist says "Why in the hell would any of the republican candidates be worried about a black guy in drag? Besides, I think Rudy (Giuliani) makes a far prettier broad." When I tried to explain to Mr. Schumacher the difference between Ron Paul and Rue Paul, he had a baffled look on his face. After about thirty seconds, Mr. Schumacher said "well, if this Ron Paul character comes from Texas, and the only things that come from Texas are steers and queers, then I would say that the republican candidates STILL don't have anything to worry about." I found this to be a very good point.
When I asked Mary Kowalski, 53, a mother of eight and a grandmother of 10 what she thinks of Ron Paul, she responded "I dont like to judge others for who they are, especially when they are people of "color". I mean, if a black man likes to dress up in women's clothing, who are we to judge?"
After I explained the difference between Ron Paul and Rue Paul to Mrs. Kowalski, she responded "He sounds like a queer. He wants peace with the world? Oh yeah, he's definitely a queer. I mean, look at what Iraq did to us on 9/11, not to mention what they did to the Jews back in the 40's. What about when we declared our independence from Iraq, they came here on their camels with box-cutters and THREATENED us. Has Ron Paul forgotten about that?" Mrs. Kowalski is right about one thing: peace is very queer.
If the opinions of the socially elite indicate anything, it is that most Americans don't know the difference between a black man in drag, and a congressman from Texas. After all, the only things that come from Texas are steers and queers. Indeed, congressman Paul is pretty queer amongst his party.