Written by Myst R ey Writer
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Saturday, 27 October 2007

image for South Dakota National Guardsman AWOL from firefighting duty in California
Senior Master B Ater "Chevy". If found, do not return to sender.

Not to be outdone by the outpouring of relief from other states in the wake of the calamity in California a single South Dakota National Guardsman was dispatched to California to provide assistance to help fight fires and coordinate aid for victims of the recent natural disaster.

Army Master Bater "Chevy" Cherokee was last seen hitch-hiking near the San Francisco bath house district. Investigative reporting on the background of the purported National Guard soldier found that "Chevy" was he founding member of a one man sub-cult which worships a mentally challenged fire sprite named Horpus and generate funds by door to door singing of Tip-toe Through the Tulips by Tiny Tim.

When questions about the validity and overall impact of South Dakota sending a lone National Guardsman to California the head of the state NG unit quipped "Hey! it's good for morale, that guy is always a downer plus we seem to have more paper towels in our bathrooms now".

When alerted to the impending arrival of the South Dakota National Guardsman "Chevy", California Governor Arnold Schwarznegger frowned and said "isn't that the guy they had to ban from the Folsom Street Festival earlier this year for impersonating a dog with a wishbone stuck in his arse? It took our paramedics three hours to break that thing"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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