Washington, D.C. (TheSpoof.com)- It was revealed today that President Bush has written his memoir. The book to be published upon his exit from the White House is entitled, "If I Did It". The book details the actions taken by President Bush to bring the United States to war in Iraq.
The book is a chilling reenactment of the plot hatched by Bush, Vice President Cheney and the top staff at the White House. Bush is seen as he tries to piece together the story to be told to the American people:
"Dickie, I don't think that we can sell this thing. What's the point, anyway?" To which the Vice President replies with one word, "Oil." It is the longest sentence spoken by the Vice President all day.
"Oh, right, right." says the President. "Condi, do you think you can rope in Colin Powell on this? He's pretty smart you know, how are you going to do it?"
"It's really simple, I'll blackmail him." states Condelezza Rice, the National Security Adviser."
The President looks puzzled, "How are you going to blackmail him, he's damned near perfect?" And Ms Rice replies, "I'm going to remind him that he is a black man."
Again, the President looks puzzled. "What's that got to do with it?"
The room suddenly goes cold when she replies, "Mr President, what's a black man doing being a Republican?" A nervous chuckle from Cheney breaks the silence.
Also, the book details Mr Bush's plans upon leaving the Presidency in 2008. "Iwant to go into the MMA, the mixed martial arts. With the Army's help, I can go right to the top." he says with a smirk. "And, I want to raise show poodles."
Vice President Cheney could not be reached for comment, but then again, he could never be reached for comment during the entire eight years he spent at the White House.