Washington AC/DC - (Ass Mess): Firefighters who shone their torches at four men they discovered "having sex in the Bushes" have been disciplined by their bosses.
According to FBI reports a fire crew "spotted the men engaged in illegal dogging" after mistakenly thinking the presidential mutts Barney and Miss Beazley were conducting outdoor sexual activity with strangers on the White House lawn.
Their tactics were to "embarrass the hell out of the perpetrators" by pointing their torches at them.
The crew then returned to their usual stations.
The next day all hell broke loose.
One of the 'doggers' filed an official complaint with the White House security service accusing the four-man crew of a homophobic witch-hunt.
The firefighters were suspended immediately pending an official but hush-hush internal investigation, which alleges the crew brought the DC fire service into disrepute and misuse of fire equipment.
But one of their colleagues said yesterday: "Bollox. We're being framed! The usual suspects have made this a total farce.
"We're being treated like criminals and it has been forgotten that we witnessed something horrible on the White House lawn which the Administration is now covering up."
Another colleague said today: "This sort of stuff sure ain't on the official White House tour. And uh.....My lawyers have a copy of the video footage!"