New York, Rioters: Following the receipt of shockingly accurate reports from the FBI, and after a series of unfortunate mishaps that could have been inadvertently avoided, the NYPD today arrested the famous cat burglar who was believed to be terrorizing pet stores all over the city.
Following an emergency call, a special task force was sent to rescue a fat man trapped in a tight, leather cat-suit. In the man's apartment, which was in desperate need of some interior decoration, the police discovered tell-tale signs of a cat-napping heist. Bags of cat-feed, 14 litres of milk, a wall-poster of Halle Berry as Catwoman, and a total of 101 cats were retrieved from the scene.
The culprit was identified as Krudivicsh, an illegal immigrant, who was deemed mentally unstable. He is to be deported back to Romanovia shortly.
Facing a feline crisis, the NYPD are, for the first time, using all their effort, to successfully rehabilitate all the rescued cats. Walt Disney has stepped up to the challenge, with a plan to cash in on this opportunity. They have purchased the movie rights for a story about 101 cats being stolen, skinned by Asian children and the fur being sold in the Chinese market.