Written by Robert W. Armijo
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Topics: Larry Craig

Tuesday, 18 September 2007

image for Sen. Craig's toilet stall a tourist attraction; soon to become a National Park: Sen. Craig's Memorial to Men's Bathroom Stalls
Sen. Craig's men's bathroom stall a tourist hot spot? More like a Hall of Shame

Washington, D.C. - Along with Independence Hall in Philadelphia, the Statue of Liberty in New York, and the Lincoln Memorial in Washington D.C., all worthy monuments, made of stone or cast in metal. All lasting testimonials to political icons of the great American experiment called Democracy. Now comes the toilet stall second to the left at the Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport, Senator Larry Craig second seat of power where he now allegedly played footsy with an undercover Cop, trying to negotiate sexual favors.

"People have been flocking to the bathroom stall by the droves ever since the incident," said Frank Mathews, Minneapolis-St. Paul Int'l airport security. "It's some kind of new historical Mecca."

At first, the bathroom stall only attracted other single males who heard it was a hot spot to pickup on Senators, but then slowly families started showing up, posing in the stall, sitting on the toilet and taking pictures.

"The crowd just kept getting bigger and bigger," continued Mathews. "They all line up in front of the men's bathroom, standing there for hours to get in to spend a few minutes at most inside. All just to get the chance to sit were Sen. Craig sat. All saying, 'Look at me! I'm U.S. Senator, Craig! Quick, let me grab your [Censored]!"

Since the man's bathroom facility is located inside an Int'l airport terminal, it never closes so there is always a line outside, which has made keeping the bathroom clean very difficult for the airports custodial crew.

"I can barely get in there myself to clean it, now," said Marsha Washington, airport custodian. "But you know what? Actually, even with all these people going in and out all hours of the day and night, the place is still a whole lot of clearer than when after Sen. Craig use to use it, I can tell you that. After he'd get through with the place, it resembled a Nevada whorehouse on a Saturday night on payday."

Currently, the Republican Party in attempt to normalize Sen. Craig's unusual sexual practices in the men's public bathroom stall at the Minneapolis-St. Paul Int'l airport, its introduced legislation before the Congress declaring the site a Federal historical landmark.

If passed, the bill would make it the first toilet ever in the history to be declared a national monument under the protection of the National Parks service. Although it would not be the first time the U.S. government tried to cover-up screwing the American people by sanitizing it with the American flag and asking us to salute it to prove our patriotism.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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