Written by Andrew Lawrence
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Tuesday, 4 September 2007

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An illegal immigrant from Mexico today shot and killed a machine at the self-service checkout stand at a local Home Depot, a large home improvement supplies store, in Los Angeles.

The shooter explained, through an interpreter, that the automated check out machine he was using was speaking English instead of Spanish. This enraged the illegal immigrant who does not speak one word of English and, as a result of this cultural and linguistic disrespect and abuse, the illegal pulled out a revolver and emptied 6 shots into the offending machine.

The shooter was arrested and released and plans to sue Home Depot for $5 million.

A spokesperson for Home Depot immediately issued a statement profusely apologizing for subjecting any U.S. illegal immigrants to English.

Welcome to politically correct America.

copyright 2007 Andrew Lawrence

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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