The Republican National Committee felt it had to take this action, citing too much temptation attached to restroom visits while on the road. "The GOP has come to stand for grand old perverts," one disgusted committee member complained.
"We just can't risk any more of them disgracing themselves -- and us," said a committee member, who spoke under condition of anonymity. He added, "For now, we're telling them to follow the old dictum taught by nuns down through the ages: take care of your needs at home." A staffer amended his boss's statement to "uh, well, either at your home or in your OWN pants."
Experts from NASA have been contacted to assist in the bidding process to choose the most economical and serviceable diapers and also to provide info on the latest techniques to control diaper rash.