Written by Andrew Lawrence
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Tuesday, 28 August 2007

image for Michael Vick Signs With Prison Football League

(Atlanta) - Ex-Atlanta Falcons NFL quarterback and convicted dog fighting felon, Michael Vick, today inked a deal to play with the prison football league (the PFL).

Vick entered a plea deal in court admitting to financing a dog fighting and gambling ring and being present at, or having knowledge of, the inhumane execution of under performing dogs.

At a press conference held today, Mr. Vick admitted he made mistakes, lied to the NFL, disappointed millions of NFL fans, was a bad example for kids, was a poor excuse for a man, and said he needs to grow up. "I played football all my life. Football is all I know. Except, of course, for dog fighting."

Upon sentencing and incarceration, Vick will become the starting quarterback for the 2006 champions of the prison football league, the Pittsburgh Pit Bulls. Terms of Vick's prison league contract are reported to include a 1-year salary of $2 million and a signing bonus of $1 million.

A spokesperson for Celebrities Without Morals, commenting on the deal, stated, "Dude is a star, he should get a lot more money."

A spokesperson for People Against Bad Behavior, commenting on the deal, stated, "Dude is a criminal, he should get NO money."

copyright 2007 Andrew Lawrence

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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