(Washington DC) - Today, in a surprise Rose Garden address, President George W Bush put forth his next nomination to the Supreme Court.
During the speech, Mr Bush Stated:
My fellow Americans and members of the press -- It is with great pleasure and careful consideration that I have chosen my nomination for the Supreme Court Judiciary, Mephistopheles.
Lord Satan is a true moderate. He has had a long history of making judgments on people throughout the ages. He is Independent, working without consideration of sex, race, religion or economic status.
His unbiased decisions have been legendary, and his ability to see clearly the line between right and wrong make him an excellent choice.... Plus, he believes in God while not letting his views about the Creator impact his duty to our great country.
He is also a grand philanthropist -- dedicating his eternal life to providing affordable post-living residential space for a good portion of Mankind (heat included).
I urge all members of the Senate to take up my nomination in a timely manner and give Lucifer an 'up or down' vote.
So far, the Prince of Darkness has not made any comment.