Written by Deanna Goodson

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Topics: Food, Eating

Thursday, 4 March 2004

image for McDonald's Didn't Make Me Fat: New Lawsuit Filed
Where's the fat?

A young man tried to get really fat by eating McDonald's food. He thought it would work so he wouldn't have to.

"Yeah, I've been watching the Simpson's a lot lately and well, they inspire me. There was this one show where Homer got on disability for being over 300 lbs. I figured that wasn't so bad. I would love to stay home." Jeb Bushwhacked said from his couch today.

Jeb mentioned that he tried and tried to get fat by eating the grilled McChicken sandwiches with no bun, yogurt parfaits and Dasani water. "It just didn't work. I guess my metabolism is too high."

When asked why he didn't go for the french fries and Big Macs that do in so many others, he replied, "I'm not crazy, just lazy. Please. Everyone knows that stuff's not good for you."

Because his scheme didn't work, Jeb decided to file a lawsuit against McDonald's because it didn't make him fat.

"It's just no fair. You hold these fast food restaurants to high standards and well, they just don't deliver. It's wrong. They should pay."

Considering the lawsuit was laughed out of court, literally by Judge Larry "the Hyena" Youvegottabekiddin, this issue will have to be solved another day in another way.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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