Written by Isaac Freeman
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Topics: Ron Paul, Monster

Friday, 27 July 2007

image for Shapeshifting Ron Paul supporter spams online rally
Ron Paul in the middle of changing shape

ICUP - It has long been known that Ron Paul, doomed Republican presidential wannabe, has employed a single lone basement-dweller to promote his campaign online by "spamming" just about every online poll as well as many Web 2.1.4 (beta) sites like digg.com, myspace.com and youtube.com.

However, this story has taken on a new twist within the past couple of days. It has recently been exposed that this lone "supporter" has developed the unique ability to change shape as can be seen at the Ron Paul online rally.

Speculation has arisen in light of this that the Lone Supporter might, in fact, be Paul him/her-self! "I could have swore I saw his eyes twinkle golden on the TV, just like Mystique in X-Men!" says Jonie Furlong, an eye witness of a television broadcast on BSNN's program "Bottom-line News".

"That's preposterous," exclaims the Paul itself, "Just because I think we should secure our borders and stop wasting tax dollars doesn't mean I'm a shape-shifter!" He continues, "I've supported these very same truly Republican, conservative and constitutional principles for decades!"

Experts are foaming at the mouth, and other orifices.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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