Written by Deanna Goodson
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Topics: Sexy, Priest

Tuesday, 24 February 2004

image for Ex-Altar Boy Sues Priest for Not Molesting Him

Boston, Massachusetts -Today, ex-altar boy, Lexy "Yes I am Sexy" Smith, sued the Archdiocese of Boston because he was an altar boy who was never molested.

"I feel violated because no one ever violated me. What's wrong with me? Wouldn't you want a piece of this?" Lexy turned around and showed his rear to the crowd.

It seems that Lexy, who is now 45 and still lives at home with his mother, has endured decades of anguish because he was never touched by a cleric.

"It's not fair. Jimmy Sampson and Johnny Two-Noses were molested and they aren't cuter than I was. What's wrong with me?" He wailed to this reporter.

The Archdiocese has no comment. The heads of the Boston Church were in Salem, Massachusetts, trying to garner support for a new witch hunt.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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