Written by Heewack
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Topics: Dennis Kucinich

Monday, 23 July 2007

image for Suspicious Package Turns Out to be Dennis Kucinich
Dennis Kucinich

NEW YORK (Heewack News Network) -- A bomb squad called to investigate a suspicious package spotted near the New York Public Library discovered that the package was actually Democratic presidential candidate Dennis Kucinich.

Police cordoned off several city blocks and suspended subway service under the Library after a caller reported the suspicious-looking package at 3:42 p.m. The bomb squad arrived within minutes, NYPD spokesperson Ed Fratelli said.

The bomb squad sent a remote-controlled robot and was preparing to detonate the package when a video camera attached to the robot noticed that the package was moving, geticulating and talking. Moving in closer, the camera clearly showed that the package was in fact Kucinich, an Ohio congressman, delivering a stump speech on the war in Iraq.

After questioning Kucinich--which he later said was the most attention he's ever received since announcing his candidacy--police released him and declared him "no longer a danger to the public."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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