Written by queen mudder
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Friday, 13 July 2007

image for Hustler magazine chief offers $5 million reward for Bush gay sex proof
$5 million reward "is just for starters"

Washington DC - (Ass Mess): Jubilant at his seminal role in outing Louisiana Senator David Ritter as a serial hooker user Hustler magazine publisher Larry Flynt has put up a $5 million reward for anybody who can prove they've had gay sex with George W Bush.

"I'm confident," Flynt said today, "because Pastor Haggard-like allegations of sexual congress were rife during Bush's Texas Governorship campaign in the 1990s, but no one was willing to put up the money to validate it.

"And $5 million is just the ante-up. I'd be willing to go double that for any video proof, evidence of financial transactions in buying sex, photos or anything on paper.

"Likewise anybody who can substantiate stories of Bush's cocaine and crystal meth use right up to his 2000 presidential campaign.

"We're talking big bux here. And while the CIA may have erased most of the indictable evidence I'm confident there's a whole lotta stuff out there they ain't even heard about yet."

Ritter went on to tell reporters that it was a matter of his fundamental rights under the American Constitution to know the very worst about his country's Commander in Chief:

"I don't want any bent, corrupt but outwardly God-fearin' man like that legislating for me, especially in the areas of morality," he said.

Hustler magazine reporters were currently following up over 20 trails, Flynt added, some from very unexpected but credible sources.

"Some of the most damning leads go back to 1999 and are associated with top brass in the Pentagon.

"So if you ever wondered if it was the military screwing George Bush or vice cersa soon you'll all be able to find out!"

Make queen mudder's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 1 multiplied by 2?

5 2 1 12
64 readers are online right now!

Go to top