Written by Skews Me
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Tuesday, 10 July 2007

image for Sick man robs bank for medical benefits

(Seattle, WA) A downtown Seafirst bank was robbed at daybreak by a teen disguised with vegetation duct-taped to his body in imitation of a recent New Hampshire robbery.

Officers said 19-year-old Danny Boyer was arrested at his doctor's office and charged with robbery.

"Boyer was very cooperative," says Police Chief Carol O'Cane. "But he's not well.

"The young man has stated that he is suffering from debilitating conditions he can't afford to treat," said officer O'Cane.

A conviction will allow Mr. Boyer lifesaving surgery through the penal system medical program.

Incarceration to receive expert treatment is a growing trend among the sick and elderly willing to be locked up and undergo correctional facility procedures that may save their lives which they could not otherwise afford.

"We get guys on their last legs," says O'Cane. "It's a growing concern."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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