(Washington) - U.S. president, George W. Bush, took a polygraph test today to set the record straight about whether he lied about the Iraq war.
A White House spokesperson stated, "The president took the polygraph test to silence all the people who keep running around insisting, 'Bush lied'. He didn't lie and the results of the polygraph test prove that."
In a post-polygraph interview with Larry "softball" King, Bush said, "We went to war in Iraq based on faulty intelligence. Period. At the time, U.S. espionage capabilities were very poor, thanks to Jimmy Carter and Bill Clinton, so we had to rely on British intelligence, which turned out to be even worse than our own. Luckily, I prayed and God told me to go ahead with the shock & awe."
History will show that, according to the lie detector test, Bush didn't lie. Of course, conspiracists will insist that the test was faked or falsified or never happened ... and that it was all orchestrated by Scooter Libby.
The Bush dog had no comment.
copyright 2007 Andrew Lawrence