Written by SpaceElevator
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Tuesday, 3 July 2007

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Aurora, Ohio (Daily Barnacle Staff Writer) - A local character named "Deep Sea Dave" has thrown his diving helmet into the 2008 US presidential race.

The copper-and-brass-hooded Libertarian announced to indifferent onlookers at a former SeaWorld amusement park that he will run as an Independent candidate.

"Can I get your support?" he asked the crowd. "No, seriously -- can someone please help me stand up over here?"

Many spectators threw loose change at the man. Taking that as a positive sign, the verdigris-encrusted stranger thanked the people for their campaign contributions.

"Who will be my diving buddy?" he continued as parents pulled their children away.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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