Written by Lone Star
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this
Topics: Ron Paul, Vermont

Monday, 4 June 2007

image for Vermont Steals Ron Paul And Secedes From US
Emergency Session called to address the Republic of Vermont

Montpelier, VT (FP) - In a shocking, historic move, the entire state of Vermont has voted to secede from the United States of America. Representatives from the newly formed Republic of Vermont stated various grievances against The United States Of America.

Among the list of grievances are rampant corporate corruptions, in the highest levels of government, unjust and undeclared wars, an unsustainable economy with a looming bust approaching, and hundreds of other grievances that have made the platform of Ron Paul's campaign.

"We just got so sick of it, we decided to make a stand." Jeremy Ronaldson, a new citizen of the Republic of Vermont, said.

The United States Constitution does not explicitly forbid a state from succeeding from the Union, but the executive branch of the United States Government said it was extremely displeased by the move and that it would focus 10% of the Iraq surge to invade Vermont and return the new republic to the Union.

Congress is said to be embarrassed by Vermont's move. Speaker of the house, Nancy Pelosi said, "We thought we raised her right, but she kept talking back, and now she's gone. Papa is not going to be happy about this and I have no control over Papa when he gets home." She was said to be hysterical and screaming something about how awful the US flag was going to look now.

The Supreme Court is apathetic mainly due to the fact that they no longer have much power due to erosive legislations. "We really don't have much to do anymore. Congress has been reduced to a flower garden and we here in the Supreme Court just play dominos all day." Chief Justice John Roberts responded.

Make Lone Star's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 2 plus 4?

9 6 3 2
73 readers are online right now!

Go to top