Washington, DC (FP) - Ron Paul allowed to continue in the GOP debates "so long as he permanently wears a bull's-eye on his back" reported the GOP Tuesday.
This has been at the request of several GOP leaders who have been receiving complaints from several snipers and hit men who are having problems targeting the Congressman.
"I just can't get a bead on him, he's like some sort of possessed gazelle" said 1st Lt. Dirk Dodgeson, a covert sniper and ex-green beret.
The Congressman has been causing quite a stir in his party since his off the wall remarks that were made at the second GOP debate in South Carolina. The remarks were in reference to the possibility that the American Government is somehow responsible for the reciprocity by Islamic nations for the decades of military actions in the region.
"We have fully investigated these allegations by Congressman Ron Paul and frankly the issues he raised are issues that need to be issued by the issuers," a spokesman for the GOP affirmed. "We will work fully to investigate the Congressman...I don't know how to load this <expletive> thing.." the call went dead.
No one else could be reached for comment at the GOP headquarters and the link to contact page was removed from the website.