Written by Cal Jennings
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Topics: Gay, Fire, Gasoline

Monday, 30 April 2007

image for Tanker Fire Melts Oakland Freeway
Melted Freeway in Oakland

CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Oakland, CA - An exploding gasoline tanker melted the steel underbelly of a highway overpass in the East Bay's MacArthur Maze early this morning, causing it to collapse onto the roadway below. Gay Rights activists claim that it was a plot by the Bush Administration to keep them from getting to San Francisco to have gay sex.

The elevated roadway that fell carried Eastbound traffic from the Bay Bridge onto Interstates 580 and 980 and state Highway 24. It melted to the roadway below that connected from Southbound I-80 to I-880.

"I'll NEver make my HAIR appointment NOW," shouted one gay activist. "OH my GOd, THIS is going to be a NIGHTmare with the TRAffic problems we already HAave. Bruce will NEver forGIVE me if I'm LATE again."

The collapse is expected to prevent more than 10,000 homosexuals from having gay sex as scheduled. Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger was called to assess the problem.

"Those girly men can wait until we get funding," said Schwarzenegger, "We have enough problems with Bush in office, and I have to make plans for the Bush/Blair wedding."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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