Written by queen mudder
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Sunday, 29 April 2007

image for Corrupt Bastards Club corralled as Fitzie plays a blinder
Alaska has a lot of oil

Alaska - (Ass Mess): Aftershocks are still reverberating among Corrupt Bastards Club Alaskans one of whom, Bruce Weyhrauch, took a slippery tumble off his boat last week in dubious circumstances.

The Club members' scalps are rumored to be next as big oil graft and kickbacks investigations center around Justice Department cover-ups perpetrated by Attorney General Alberto Gonzales.

A patchwork of clues has consistently revealed its ugly head during consecutive investigations by awesome Special Procesutor Patrick Fitzgerald who recently nailed Scooter Libby as one big liar in a perjury trial about the outing of a CIA officer whose husband called out the Niger yellowcake fantasy of the Bush Administration.

Fitzie has remained enigmatic and Sphynxlike throughout his career as the odds on the Corrupt Bastards Club survival have slid towards extinction.

Weyhrauch's tumble last week prompted a quick review of FBI files connected to last year's Labor Day weekend bust of the Bastards and a re-evaluiation of his personal relationship with Gonzales, Cheney and George W Bush.

Meanwhile at a local level Weyhrauch's embarrasing moment is being probed by police who have noted his vehement denial of being DUI at the time or being involved in a confrontation with marauding Iranians, assorted pirates or VECO kickback paymasters.

Just one question remains in the Juneau Police Department chief's file: why was Weyhrauch wearing a bulletproof vest under his lifejacket? And was the extra warmth that it provided him during his 24 hour ordeal what actually kept him alive in those freezing conditions that otherwise would have despatched him to the otherside of kickback heaven?

Further developments in this story are expected next week.

Make queen mudder's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 5 plus 5?

9 3 10 21
58 readers are online right now!

Go to top